51 Frugal Goals for a Birthday Weekend

It's the birthday weekend, and I'm celebrating the 51st candle on my slice of lifetime cake.

With a gin and tonic and a lime-scented spirit of frugality, I am making these 51 wishes (goals) for the next 12-month period.

1. To save an extra $5,000 in my retirement account.




2. To spend less money on junk food.




3. To write 51 letters (snail mail) -- roughly one letter per week.




4. To write or revise 51 poems.




5. Read 51 books on finance or business development.




6. Read 51 books on spirituality and personal development.




7. To fine tune my strategy for the next 51 years.




8. To have 51 sugar-free days a year. (One day each week without sweets.)




9. Cook or bake 51 new recipes.




10. To giveaway 51 bits of clothing, books or merchandise that I don't need.




11. To compete 51 acts of random kindness.




12. To make 51 new friends on Twitter.




13. To finally open a Facebook account.




14. To have a 51 clutter-busting days: one per week.




15. Create and update photo books and scrapbooks for my kids.




16. Commit to 51 special one-on-one moments with each of my three kids: Special notes or activities.




17. To do 51 extra sit-ups each week.




18. 51 minutes of meditation each week.




19. To let others speak 51 words for every word I speak.




20. 51 manicures...fresh polish each week with either DIY or periodic salon splurge.




21. 51 facials and deep conditions.




22. 51 pedicures.




23. 51 new pairs of shoes ---just joking! How about: 51 sunrise yoga sessions.




24. Regular conversations with family members.




25. Create 51 new play lists featuring Anita Baker, Steely Dan and my other favorite artists.




26. To take 51 new photos of my family and dog.




27. To get all of my annual checkups.




28. Encourage family and friends to get all of their checkups.




29. To make amends to everyone I have offended.




30. To get up 51 minutes earlier.




31. To go to sleep 51 minutes earlier.




32. To learn 51 new words in English, Spanish, French and Hebrew.




33. To exercise 51 minutes per day.




34. To say "thank you," "bless you" and "love you" 51 times daily.




35. 51 acts of charity.




36. 51 minutes of laughing each day.




37. 51 minutes of forgiveness each week.




38. To let go of old grievances.




39. To forgive myself.




40. To forgive others.




41. To floss daily.




42. To drink at least 51 cups of water a week.




43. To increase my emergency fund by 51 percent.




44. Improve deadline performance by 51 percent.




45. To increase my income by 51 percent.




46. To write 51 percent more each day.




47. To pray more and to complain less.




48. To look at the moon through a telescope.




49. To climb 51 stairs a day.




50. To think of 51 reasons to be at peace with myself.




51. To think of 51 reasons to be grateful for friends, family and loved ones.

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Sharon is the author of the Frugal Duchess: How to Live Well and Save Money -- a coming of age memoir about money -- and a contributing writer in Wise Bread's 10,0001 Ways to Live Large on a Small Budget.

OK, OK: A Whine-Free, Turning-50 Birthday List: Frugal and Grateful

Did my turning-50 birthday "wish-list" sound like a complaint list? So sorry! It could easily be read as "50 Reasons to Whine" or "50 Things Missing From My Life." Hmmm!?! In fact, fellow blogger Father Sez left this comment:

"Happy Birthday, Duchess. You have not listed the 5,000 things you are grateful that you already have."


Thank you, Father Sez: I have, at least 5,000 reasons to be grateful, including my children. So here's the flip side of the birthday list.

1. Original: Good health and the continued good health of my loved ones

Grateful spin: I'm grateful for my good health and for the good health of those that I love. I can see, hear, jump, dance and write. I feel blessed.

2. A spa date at the Ritz-Carlton in Key Biscayne

I recently attended a business retreat at the Ritz-Carlton in Key Biscayne. After the formal workshop sessions, we were offered free chair massages, manicures or pedicures and a free makeover. I left the event feeling great and looking great.

3. Financial security

Due to new opportunities, including a full-time job with a non-profit organization, my personal finance outlook has improved. I've also started other initiatives that will help. I'm grateful for those opportunities.

4. Lower gas prices

The recent spike in gas prices has prompted us to talk more about public transportation, conservation and fuel-efficient cars. That's a side benefit.

5. More funding for public transportation and education

I am grateful that I have the right to vote and to lobby for community programs that benefit all. And as public transportation becomes more popular, more voters will support funding for mass transit.

6. Sailing lessons and a sailboat

I am grateful that I have friends with boats. I'm grateful that it's very affordable to rent a boat for the day through some of our public or private marine clubs and centers.

7. Peace & forgiveness from anyone I've upset, angered, annoyed, hurt...

Working on this and I'm grateful.

8. Daily yoga classes with my favorite trainers

There are several low-cost yoga classes offered in many neighborhoods. These resources include: community centers, public gardens, hospitals and area schools. There are also free exercise tapes available through the public library.

9. World peace

I can start by making peace in personal areas of conflict.

10. Hot, sweet Cuban coffee with cream every morning: A cortadito!

We make great coffee at home. Nearby markets sell Cuban coffee for 50 cents to $1.29 a serving and I'm grateful for delicious cheap coffee.

11. Time to see every game, play or after-school event featuring my children

I have been blessed to attend sooo many games. I'm grateful for every rebound, song and dramatic speech I've witnessed my children deliver. I'm grateful that I have children. I'm grateful that I have work-commitments that often take me away from my children because the money earned supports my family. I'm grateful that my new employer has very family-friendly policies.

12. Season tickets to Miami Heat games

There are super cheap tickets for $10-12 each. It's also great to listen to a basketball game on the radio or to watch a game at a sports bar with my sons. Additionally, I am grateful to friends who have "gifted" us with game seats from time to time.

13. Enough time and discipline to answer all comments on my blog --Time to write more posts and articles

I'm grateful to be blogging here and now. As my time-management skills improve, I will find more time to write.

14. Funds to pay back my parents for all of the support they have given to me and my children over the years.

I'm working on this. Meanwhile, I'm so grateful for their support and the support of my siblings.

15. More time to resume my (MFA) graduate-degree studies

It's never too late to earn a graduate degree. I'm so grateful for the semester that I spent reading and writing papers for a graduate program. And if I don't earn my degree until I'm 60 or 70, that's fine.

16. Makeup/cosmetics without preservatives and other harmful chemicals

Read the labels. Do your homework and don't spend money on products that could compromise your health. Thankfully there are websites and information about harmful cosmetics. More companies are also creating organic lines of personal care products.

17. An afternoon with Toni Morrison, Angela Davis and Oprah

I'm grateful for the Internet, which provides me with virtual mentoring sessions with those women and others.

18. Great sales for my book: The Frugal Duchess: How to Live Well & Save.

The book party at Books & Books in Miami Beach was a success. Over 150 people showed up and I signed books for two hours. I'm grateful for every sale and I'm glad that my family and friends have purchased so many copies of my book.

19. Enough money to fund parenting workshops for teenage mothers

There are so many community programs that offer this service. Why not write a check? Even a small donation will help.

20. A new battery for my laptop

Order a darn battery and stop complaining.

21. A complete collection of Sex and the City -- I just started watching that HBO series

Order, borrow or check out clips on YouTube.

22. A copy of every movie adapted from a Jane Austen novel

I'm grateful for the library and the video store. I also enjoy all of the fan literary sites that offer creative versions and updates of Jane Austen tales.

23. To be debt-free

There are so many resources online, in the bookstore and in the personal finance network. Make a plan and stick to it.

24. Defensive driving lessons and the courage to finally start driving

I'm grateful for public transportation. I'm grateful that I have so many friends who drive.

25. A trust fund to launch a national billboard campaign in support of public transportation

During recent television and radio interviews, I've mentioned public transportation. I'm grateful for the opportunities.

26. A financial planning session with Warren Buffett

Go online. Use the Internet. Virtual mentoring is wonderful.

27. My own Frugal Duchess show on YouTube.

Don't complain. Don't wish. Just shoot, point and talk.

28. Teflon skin

Whatever.

29. Enough money to adopt or support at least five more children.

Start saving and be grateful for the children you have.

30. A weekly facial date.

I'm grateful that I have inherited great skin from my parents. The Internet has great resources for do-it-yourself facials and home spas.

31. To become very skilled at giving myself a french manicure

Thankfully, there are wonderful kits on the market. Invest and practise.

32. To be a better speller and proof-reader

I'm grateful: My new job forces me to be more detail-oriented. I'm learning to pay better attention. And thank goodness for spellcheck functions!

33. To be more patient with myself and others

Okay. It's a process.

34. To allocate 10 minutes a day for meditation, no matter how busy

I'm grateful for the daily planning programs on my computer. I will add meditation to the action plan.

35. To become a third-degree black belt in karate

I'm grateful for my limited martial arts training and I'm grateful for my newfound self-honesty, which prompts me to ask: Do you really want to spar, break boards and kick someone in the jaw? Do you really want to be a target?

Try tai-chi. Just chill out and forget the competitive parts of martial arts.

36. T0 get seven hours of sleep each night

Thank Goodness for Shabbas! During the weekly Sabbath, I nap a lot on Saturday afternoons. Also: I'm grateful that work and other creative opportunities keep me up late at night during the rest of the week.

37. To keep my house neater

I'm working on this.

38. To take a cruise to Alaska

Thank goodness for the Caribbean cruise I took two years ago with my parents and extended family to celebrate my mom's 70th birthday.

39. To let go of anger, depression and fear

I'm working on this. Thankfully.

40. To invest in stress-reduction classes

Ditto.

41. To be better about sending out thank-you notes

Thankfully, I recognize that this is a problem and I have been better about saying: Thank You!

42. To be completely honest with myself

Ditto.

43. To be better and quicker at detecting the big and small lies I tell myself

Ditto.

44. To be kinder to others

Working on this!

45. To eat ice cream every day without worrying about my weight

I'm grateful that ice cream remains a special treat. I'm grateful that I am no longer super skinny. I am grateful for size inflation because although I have gained 25 pounds since my twenties, (jumping to 115 pounds from 90 pounds), I still wear the same clothing size.

46. To have more children in my life.

I'm grateful for all of the children who are already in my life. I'm blessed.

47. To be more appreciative.

Grateful that I recognize this as a fault. Grateful to all who have pointed out this fault.

48. To bake my own bread and eat only organic food.

Grateful to have the resources to buy organic food. (I shop the sales.) I'm grateful to friends who have offered to bake bread with me.

49. To learn a few ballroom dances

Grateful for all of the times that I have waltzed with my dad. Grateful for all of the times I have danced around the house with my children.

50. To earn a spot on American Gladiator or Dancing With the Stars

Do I really want Crush to whip my butt on the Pyramid? Do I really want Helga to tackle me?

I don't think so. I'm grateful for the Internet, which enables me to watch some of my favorite shows online.

And if you've read this far: I'm grateful to you for listening to me.

Thank You!

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50 Wishes for My 50th Birthday

My 50th Birthday is Friday, July 11 and I'm assembling a wish list, including:

1. Good health and the continued good health of my loved ones

2. A spa date at the Ritz-Carlton in Key Biscayne

3. Financial security

4. Lower gas prices

5. More funding for public transportation and education

6. Sailing lessons and a sailboat

7. Peace & forgiveness from anyone I've upset, angered, annoyed, hurt...

8. Daily yoga classes with my favorite trainers

9. World peace

10. Hot, sweet Cuban coffee with cream every morning: A cortadito!

11. Time to see every game, play or after-school event featuring my children

12. Season tickets to Miami Heat games

13. Enough time and discipline to answer all comments on my blog --Time to write more posts and articles

14. Funds to pay back my parents for all of the support they have given to me and my children over the years.

15. More time to resume my (MFA) graduate-degree studies

16. Makeup/cosmetics without preservatives and other harmful chemicals

17. An afternoon with Toni Morrison, Angela Davis and Oprah

18. Great sales for my book: The Frugal Duchess: How to Live Well & Save.

19. Enough money to fund parenting workshops for teenage mothers

20. A new battery for my laptop

21. A complete collection of Sex and the City -- I just started watching that HBO series

22. A copy of every movie adapted from a Jane Austen novel

23. To be debt-free

24. Defensive driving lessons and the courage to finally start driving

25. A trust fund to launch a national billboard campaign in support of public transportation

26. A financial planning session with Warren Buffett

27. My own Frugal Duchess show on YouTube.

28. Teflon skin

29. Enough money to adopt or support at least five more children.

30. A weekly facial date.

31. To become very skilled at giving myself a french manicure

32. To be a better speller and proof-reader

33. To be more patient with myself and others

34. To allocate 10 minutes a day for meditation, no matter how busy

35. To become a third-degree black belt in karate

36. Te get seven hours of sleep each night

37. To keep my house neater

38. To take a cruise to Alaska

39. To let go of anger, depression and fear

40. To invest in stress-reduction classes

41. To be better about sending out thank-you notes

42. To be completely honest with myself

43. To be better and quicker at detecting the big and small lies I tell myself

44. To be kinder to others

45. To eat ice cream every day without worrying about my weight

46. To have more children in my life.

47. To be more appreciative.

48. To bake my own bread and eat only organic food.

49. To learn a few ballroom dances

50. To earn a spot on American Gladiator or Dancing With the Stars

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Let Them Eat Cake: Tea Parties, Dessert Buffets & Other Frugal Event Planning Ideas

Food is the largest expense for most parties. But you can cut the food budget by selecting party hours that don't require full-course meals. I call it the art gallery approach to home entertaining. Many galleries hold elegant parties in the late-afternoon or after dinner.

The bottom line: Skip the main course and spend more on desserts and beverages.

That's how my latest column in the Miami Herald begins. Here's a link to the full column.
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The Frugal Duchess Boutique
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How to Recycle Gifts

Regifting! Many of us do it. Few of us own up to it. The problem is the word itself. To my ears, "regifting" sounds underhanded or dubious.

And there's nothing wrong with recycling gifts. If don't like knitting kits, but my neighbor Joannie is a big knitter, what's wrong with re-packaging the knitting kit from Aunt Ida and giving it to Joannie? Passing along the right gifts to the right owners is good karma and very frugal. Why should a perfectly good present turn to dust in my closet simply because it's found the wrong owner?

Recycled gifts are great for holidays, children's birthday parties and other events.

I have four rules for recycling gifts.

1. Be mindful. It's the thought that counts. Really. Mindless recycling is a waste of energy, time and materials. Take the time to really match the right gift to the right person.

2. Make sure the present is in good shape. If it's all dinged up and the package has become very un-gently worn, then I'll just give it to a thrift store.

3. Rewrap. Refreshen. Make the decorations your own before passing it on.

4. Keep Track! Don't give the gift back to the original giver.

Meanwhile, this MSN piece by MP Dunleavey features 12 great tips for "re-gifting" or whatever you want to call it.
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The Frugal Duchess Boutique
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