Do We Spend Too Much on Our Kids? A Quiz

For each child, the typical middle-class family spends about $1,200 a year on entertainment, personal care & misc. perks; and another $580 on clothes. Those annual figures --from a 2005 USDA report -- exclude food, ($1,900), childcare ($1,200), transportation ($1,600) and healthcare ($580).

Those figures seem a little low to me, judging from the cellphones, iPods, Gameboys and laptops that I've seen on some kids, including my own. So, I wonder: Do we spend too much, too soon, too unwisely on our kids? In the July 2007 issue of GH, financial columnist Jane Bryant Quinn offers a spending reality check: a short quiz for parents. I've paraphrased the questions & included my own short answers. Feel free to leave your own answers in the comment section or send me an email. (Sharonhr@bellsouth.net)


1. Your kid requests a special gadget or item. Do you purchase the trinket right away rather than wait for a holiday or b-day?

(We wait --90 percent of the time, but-- honestly--not always.)

2. When your older children (age 7) and above ask for something (needed or wanted) do you automatically buy it without asking them to kick in with funds from their allowance or savings?

(We usually opt for the joint payment plan with wish-list items. But if they need something for school, we pay for it.)

3. Do you feel obligated to throw huge birthday bashes because that's the standard in your neighborhood?

(No way!!! We take pride in our low-ticket, old-school b-day parties. We even play Pin-the-Tail on the Donkey.)

4. Do you gripe about your child's cellphone bill, but cover the c-phone tab anyway?

(Not an issue: Our biggest gabber has a no-frills, local-call only, unlimited minute plan).

5. Look at the floor space in your child's bedroom: Is there more stuff on the phone than free floor space?

(Ouch: That one really hits home. Once my mom saw my kids' overstuffed toy closet and asked me: "Did we not give you enough toys as a kid?" Toys are us. )


6. Are your kids permitted to shop with the family credit card with no limits?
(NO!~)

7. Do you have an easier time spending freely on your kids than on yourself?

(No comment)

quiz key: Two or more yes answers means that you are probably overspending on the kids.

By the way, the July 2007 issue of Good Housekeeping reports that families in the $43,200 to $72,600 income bracket spend about $7,500 a year on each kid based on government figures.
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Mommy I'm Bored: 25 Frugal Ways to Beat Summer Bordeom

My 9-year-old daughter does not go to camp until July 9. That's when her drama camp begins. But the plot has already thickened in my house with a steady chorus of: Mommy, I'm Bored!


Here's what we're doing to cure the summer blues:


25 Frugal Things to Do with Kids.


1. Write a book. My daughter has written a how-to-manual for kids. It's a short guide about fixing everyday problems. She has typed up the book and I want her to create pictures. Meanwhile, a close friend suggests another project: Mommy, I'm Bored.



2. Crafts at the library: In addition to story hour, one of our local branches offered a free craft hour. My daughter made a bookmark and decorated a small wooden box.


3. Dissect old machinery: With tools and light supervision, my daughter and a friend spent hours investigating the guts of an old machine. They learned a lot and enjoyed the process.


4. Start a reading club (with other children)


5. Go to the Beach, the playground or a park.



6. Check out free programs at public buildings, museums and malls.


7. Visit botanical gardens. We found a $5 yoga class and low-cost art instructions at one of the local (public) gardens.


8. Play Neopets.com. There are lots of games and money-related activities at Neopets.com. My daughter has actually learned a lot about commerce from this site. Kids adopt electronic pets and then are responsible for feeding, housing and entertaining their pets. Kids can play games or set up a store or shop. I like to play the slot machines in the game arcade. It's a frugal way to gamble. I get the thrill of the casino without the expense.

9. Go for a walk.


10. Cook.


11. Shop for food. We went to the grocery store today. My daughter put together her wish list: ice cream, berries, whip cream and cookie crisp cereal. We had fun.


12. Write a letter: My daughter has written a cute, cute letter to my folks. I have to remember to mail it.


13. Start a craft project


14. Go to a yard sale, flea market or estate sale


15. Surf the Internet for vacation ideas.


16. Looking for old-school games on the Internet. My daughter Googled "marbles" and found a lot of marble games. She and a friend printed out the instructions and played marbles.


17. Watch Disney.com. Also try crayola.com, and familyfun.com


18. Free movie camps. I've written about this in the past (last June) and here is the link to my story. Basically, many of the major movie chains have free movie mornings for families.


19. Create a "summer buddy program." My daughter called around looking for play dates and friends to share in new activities.



20. Co-worker program. I gave my daughter an assignment to interview my parents about how they paid for college expenses. It was a win-win-win. I really needed the information; she pretended to be a reporter and the grandparents were happy to chat with her. (She enjoyed herself also).


21. Rent videos from the library. The children's selection of our local library is great.


22. Start a parent-child summer book club. I am reading the same book as my 12-year-old son. We've had some insightful short chats and I will take him out for pizza and we'll really discuss the book in depth.


23. Find them a job. For one afternoon, my daughter worked as a mother's helper for a friend who had an active toddler. My friend was able to finish a project and my daughter had an afternoon of fun while playing with a toddler. She also earned a few dollars.


24.Make a list of summer activities. "Wow, I have done a lot," my daughter said as we worked on this list together.


25. Get ice cream: It's free; it's cheap. It's cool.

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How a Real Duchess Recycles a Royal Wedding Dress

Why spend a fortune on a dress that you'll only wear once? Apparently that idea recently ran through the mind of the Duchess of Cornwall --Camilla--who was recently photographed wearing her wedding dress. The British newspapers are calling her the: "Royal Recycler."

"...the Duchess of Cornwall obviously couldn't bear to confine her beautiful wedding outfit to the back of the wardrobe. The royal recycler wore the ivory-hued Robinson Valentine ensemble again this week as she attended the opening of the National Assembly of Wales with her husband."
--source: Hello magazine

The Duchess recycled her dress with new accessories, including a different hat and pearls.

There are other ways to recycle a wedding dress:

1. Donate it to charity. This article from an ABC station has some tips about donating a wedding dress to charity.

2. Create a wedding dress bank. In my community, various women maintain a stock of wedding dresses. It's like a borrowing library and it's filled with gowns for brides, mothers of the bride, and bridesmaids. This free dress lending service really cuts down on wedding costs and creates a real sense of community. And each dress looks different on every girl or woman. I've gone to lots of local weddings and I've never spotted a familiar-looking dress.

3. Give it to your sister, cousin or daughter. For my Central Park Wedding in 1992, I wore a hand-me-down gown from one of my younger sisters. It was an expensive dress, but I only spent about $150 on alterations and cleaning. Beyond my immediate family, no one -- at least until now -- realized that my gown was a repeat performer.

4. Sell it on eBay, a consignment store or through a standard newspaper classified ad.

5. Alter it and wear it again. Wear your wedding dress--done over--to a black-tie event.





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Beyond Spitballs & Soda: Unusual Uses for Straws

From storing necklaces & nuts to providing garden support, straws aren't just for sipping. Here are a variety of uses for straws as compiled by Maya Jaffe, Frugal Duchess intern.

Keep Jewelry Untangled- The oblong shape of a straw is perfect for storing a necklace or bracelet. Just string the necklace or links through the straw to prevent tangles. This idea was once proposed to me, and I use it today, making all my jewelry easily accessible when needed.

Garden Stem Cell Support- This website provides helpful details about using straws to support the drooping plants in your garden and in your house. Use green transparent straws, a box knife, and a ruler. Cut the straw down one side and fit the divided tube around a stem that needs extra support. This support system won't spoil the look of your garden (if you use green straws) or block the sun. What's more, plastic straws are waterproof.

Artist Paintbrush Drying Racks- Straws provide a convenient way to store and dry (clean) paintbrushes. Here's the link.

Associated Content also lists five helpful tips for blowing more than air out of straws:

1) Homemade Single Serving Drink Packs-

2) Homemade Bubble Blowers

3) Remove Air From Plastic Freezer Bags-

4) Kids' Jewelry and Trinket Craft Materials- Cut into different shapes, straws are like flexible beads and can be used for a wide range of craft projects.

5) Hardware storage: It's like stringing beads: nuts, bolts and washers can be strung on a straw for easy storage. Secure both ends of the straw and you won't have to worry about random nuts and bolts in your toolbox.

--written and researched by Maya Jaffe, Frugal Duchess Intern
--edited by shr
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How Home Repairs Can Lower Insurance Bills

Home repairs can be a two-for-one special. First, maintenance work upgrades your home. And second, repairs and home improvements could also lower the cost of your home insurance bill, according to insurance experts.

''If you've made significant improvements to your home, you should, by all means, notify your insurance company,'' said Jeanne Salvatore, a spokeswoman for the Insurance Information Institute. ``You want to make sure that you get every available discount that you are entitled to.''

Here's a rundown of potential savings:

• Inquire about discounts: A new roof or roof repairs may translate into a discount. Upgraded plumbing or a new heating/air-conditioning system may also qualify for discounts, according to Matt McWilliams, co-founder of HometownQuotes.com (www.hometownquotes.com), an online insurance portal. Some insurance companies offer 5 percent to 15 percent discounts if you have upgraded or modernized the wiring in your home within the last 10 years, according to the Insurance Information Institute.

• Safety and burglar alarms. You could qualify for a discount of 15 to 20 percent off your home insurance premium for good fire alert or security systems, Salvatore said. Insurers provide the greatest discounts to systems that alert authorities or other emergency systems. Security lights, smoke detectors and deadbolt locks can yield discount points of 5 percent or higher.

• Look for obscure savings. If your home is near a fire hydrant or in a municipality with professional firefighters (versus volunteers), your insurer may provide discounts. Additionally, ask about reduced-risk security discounts if you are retired or work from a home office. Your constant presence in the home means that a fire will be quickly detected and the home will be less of a target for criminals. Some companies provide a 10 percent discount to retirees.
For a free online brochure of money-saving tips, visit www.iii.org and click on the home section.

That's from my latest column in the Home & Design section of the Miami Herald.
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How & Why I Found Interns: My Frugal Internship Program

Flexo of Consumerism Commentary noticed that I have a new intern, who wrote a recent Tuesday Tips piece for me. Flexo inquired about the intern. Here's the scoop on my informal, but frugal internship program.


Help Wanted! For the following reasons, I began recruiting interns:

1. Book project: I've been writing a book, with a July 15 due date and a May 2008 publication date. Between the blog posts, a part-time teaching gig, newspaper/freelance print assignments, family & bills, I needed to budget my time.

An intern, I've found, is great for researching my weekly Tuesday Tips segment on my blog. This option frees up a bit of time.


2. My hands, elbows, & etc. Quite frankly, my digits and arms sometimes ache from assorted writing activities.

Remedies: ice packs, wrist splints, yoga, PT exercises. Later this summer, I will take a two-week sabbatical from typing. (HINT: I'M PITCHING FOR GUEST WRITERS!! Please). I'm also going to check out voice-activated writing software. Another writer has promised to walk me through a program that he uses and highly recommends.


With an intern, contributing to the Tuesday Tips feature, my hands receive extra rest.


3. Teaching: I like to share information & skills with students. I think writing is a valuable craft that has become undervalued in our society. Also, I have become a better writer by teaching. This same philosophy applies to my children.

My oldest son (a high school student) is also helping with a research project this summer. Our work together is mutually beneficial. I've also been teaching my younger children how to conduct interviews. They've been assigned to interview family members for one of my projects.

These activities keep their brains sizzling during the summer months.


How I found interns:


1. High School students
2. My children
3. College students: I thought of looking for journalism students from local universities or colleges. (I haven't tried this option yet). When and if I go this route, I will contact different writing programs in Southern Florida.



The System:

1. The List: For my son, I have typed out very specific instructions. For example, I needed research about 529 college savings plans. I walked him through the information on the Florida prepaid plan and then told him to look for other sites.

I gave my other intern, a tour of my blog and the type of tips I seek. We communicate via email and phone.


2. Flexibility: I try to find a variety of assignments that suit an intern's interests, time and talents.


3. Edit and fact check. Interns are requested to provide contact and resource info. I check the links and quickly review research material to make sure that everything is kosher by ethical and professional standards.


4. Review corrections, edits or re-writes. To clarify and instruct, I try to explain why I make changes in their stories. It's another win-win.


5. Praise and correct and praise. Positive and constructive feedback is important.


6. Production: Under deadline guidelines, information is submitted to me via e-mail or in a Word file. I handle all inputs onto my blog or manuscripts.


7. I listen: Maya Jaffe, the Tuesday Tip intern had valuable suggestions. Likewise, my son Tali has made insightful comments about the data we have collected and has re-designed a few charts for me. He's even edited my word choice on graphs. For me, it's a well-time lesson in humility.







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Commenting on Golbguru's List of 25 Frugal Habits

Who drives an old car, wears ratty jeans and kills bugs with boric acid? The answer: golbguru at Money, Matter, and More Musings, who put together his list of 25 Things We Do To Save Money. I've been a big fan of these lists and have read the collection put together by Dawn at Frugal for Life, which includes a link to several lists, including mine.
*By the way: I've corrected the headline, where I had an incorrect spelling of Golbguru's name.
Here are a few of my favorite tips from Golbguru's list with my feedback:

#2 We drive a 10 year old used car and try to maintain it regularly (as much as possible). It does gives us problems, and generally costs a lot for repairs, but we have figured out that it’s more economical (for now) to keep this junker than to buy a newer (better) car.

My comment: Our family car is also an old model. It's a 1994 mini-van. Even with repairs, it's still cheaper than buying a new car. We purchased the car last year for about $1,000 from a family friend. And we've been relatively pleased and it's great to be free of car payments.

#4 Instead of pesticide sprays for roaches, we use boric acid – one pound of boric acid costs about $2 and works much better than most other expensive chemicals. Now-a-days the roaches are gone (except the occasional visitor from outside) and I think that’s because of a combination of boric acid and a clean sink. Come to think of it, a clean sink and a clutter free home are free ways of getting rid of roaches - that’s cheaper than boric acid.

My comment: We've used plain old dish soap to zap bugs in our garden. I also recently read in a magazine (First for Women) that soap shavings on plants also control garden pests.

#5 I wear some clothes like this one in the photograph: [Frugal Duchess note: check out the photos of his clothing] It’s a picture of my favorite piece of clothing - a 4+ year old blue jeans from Walmart. This is in accordance with the 2nd rule of graduate school - No one cares about what you wear (the first rule is - It’s OK to procrastinate). Anyways, I think I have the capacity to keep wearing this pair of jeans for some more months (may another year) before I start feeling embarrassed about it’s condition. Probably, my wife will be embarrassed to walk with me sooner than that. Note that this is just an example; not all my clothes are in this condition, although quite a few of them are older than 5 years.

My comment: Some of my favorite pieces of clothing are old, old, old and my husband has several pairs of ratty jeans. I love my little black bolero jacket from Yves St. Laurent that someone gave me in 1998. I've worn the jacket at black-tie events and to sporting events.

#10 We don’t have cable. Why? I don’t think we have enough time to watch what an average cable connection offers here. Plus, we are not *attached* to any particular television program or series. We get crystal clear reception for a number of popular programs (Raymond, Simpsons, Friends, House, etc.) using a $9 antenna from Walmart.

My comment: My house is also a cable-free zone and in a earlier post, I've written about how How I Get Cable Shows For Free. Dave Lucas also recently addressed this topic.

#13 We use compact fluorescent (CF) lights only in our home. CF lights save money and I personally like the white light (I am aware that some people don’t like it too much). We use a combination of those spiral CF bulbs and those long fluorescent shoplights.

My comment: I've been meaning to try CF's for a long while. This post inspires me to finally get going on this money-saving; energy saving option.

#19 For vacations, we usually try to locate some good friends near our destinations who would be willing to host us - it saves a bunch of money on hotels. Most of you probably remember a few of my recent posts about our trip to Philadelphia/New
York - we were hosted by our close friends during the visit. There are some disadvantages to being hosted by friends, but let’s not talk about it here.

My comment: Great advice! When I went to Paris (twice), I stayed with friends. Friends and family have also provided free accommodations in London, New York, Orlando, Pittsburgh and LA. I try to be a good guest by bringing gifts, a good attitude and an offer of free labor. __________


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Angelina Jolie's $26 Dress & My Best Cheap Fashion Tricks

Angelina Jolie recently wore a $26 dress to a Red Carpet event. Her shoes, however, cost over $1,000, according to press reports. Nevertheless, I give Jolie high marks for her frugal fashion choice and she picked a great dress.

Here are the details from Hollyscoop.com:

"Angelina Jolie stepped out with her man Brad for her "A Mighty Heart" premiere in a $26 vintage dress but dressed it up with a pair of $1000+ Christian Louboutin shoes. Jolie told Access Hollywood that she found the crushed velvet black frock at the vintage store Wasteland on Melrose Avenue in LA." source: Hollyscoop.com

Her fashion choice sparked rave reviews. Here are a few samples:

The Celebrity Cafe, StyleDash and Damn I'm Cute.

Unlike Jolie I can't combine frugal fashion with expensive shoes, but here are:

My Best Five Cheap Fashion Tricks

1. Borrow clothes from a friend with a great closet or try the HMD (Hand me Down) store. Get give-aways from well-groomed, fashion friendly pals.

2. Find second-hand (thrift, consignment, vintage) stores in upscale neighborhoods. I know an older woman who loves to go the Goodwill and Red, White & Blue stores in wealthy areas. Her reasoning: Better Zoned Donations.

3. Shop off-season for classic garments. I found a well-made $129 skirt for $29 and a $99 outfit for $9 at Anthropologie during an end-of-season sale.

4. Make friends with the salesclerks. One store manager gave me her markdown schedule and once tracked down a past-season tweed skirt that a customer had returned. The skirt (still new) was unworn, but marked down to $6 because it was a year-old.

5. Stop stressing about the clothes and buy a great tube of lipstick, a cute hair ornament or unusual jewelry. I've even dressed up an old dress with a new hair cut or hair style.

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How to Fix DVDs with Toothpaste & Other Odd Tips

Can you really fix a DVD or repair a wall with toothpaste? Apparently, toothpaste does far more than clean teeth.

It can also polish and clean items around the house as well! Consider this list:

• Scratches on DVDs and CDs and glass can instantly be removed via polishing with toothpaste due to its mild abrasive power. Our tester-- Maya Jaffe-- personally tested the power of toothpaste on a scratched movie scene from The Notebook. The DVD returned to its tissue-grabbing self after applying toothpaste in circular motions, Maya reports.
• Piano Key Repair: Scratches too can be removed from delicate, hard-to-manage ivory piano keys, according to this article from Associated Content.
• Wall Repair. Toothpaste, as legend has it, can also clean crayon off painted walls, and once the walls are clean, we can also fill holes in the wall with toothpaste, using it as temporary caulking to seal cracks and spaces- just make sure to paint over as to prevent ants.
• Laundry Fix: Toothpaste can clean our clothing as well! Stubborn Kool-Aid, lipstick, and ink stains can be removed by applying toothpaste to the offending spots. You can also remove scuff marks from shoes with a bit of dental paste. Here's how: apply a bit of toothpaste to the shoe with a damp cloth. Source: Associated Content
• Polish Gems and Metal RD.com and www.geocities.com/remedypage/20uses/ describe how toothpaste can be used as a makeshift polisher for silver, jewelry, the sink, and other kitchen appliances.
• Zit Medicine.Lastly, there is the infamous toothpaste tip. It’s the night before the prom and a huge zit is on your chin. Before you panic, apply some non-gel toothpaste, which will dehydrate the pimple and absorb the oil. However, if one has sensitive skin, I wouldn’t recommend this. Personal note from the editor: This tip works, but I (Sharon) only recommend it during the day. The toothpaste worked on my pimple, but attracted an ant or two while I slept. Horrible.

Editor's Note: This report--with my edits-- was prepared by the new Frugal Duchess Intern Maya Jaffe, a talented journalism student. Welcome Maya!

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Knobs, Handles & Frugal Kitchen Accessories.

Kitchen remodeling projects have hidden costs, including the perhaps unexpected expense of replacing knobs and handles for cabinets and drawers. Even in my small kitchen, I have about three dozen door handles and drawer knobs, with potential replacement costs of several hundred dollars. Fortunately, a friend has found a shortcut that saved her time, money and gasoline.

• Shop on-line: On the Internet, my friend found D. Lawless Hardware (www.dlawlesshardware.com), an Illinois-based company with great deals. ''I was amazed at the incredible selection. Even better, the prices ran the gamut,'' she said. For $1.79 each, she purchased cobalt blue glass knobs, with matching pulls for $3.79 each. The company will match prices if you find better deals elsewhere and my friend received free shipping because her order was over $50.

• Clearance section: Either online or in standard stores, clearance sections often have great prices. D. Lawless Hardware has a ''dollar and under'' section. Likewise, at Anthropologie, a fashion, accessory and home chain store, I recently found attractive knobs and pulls in the mark-down section. My finds included knobs reduced to $2 from $8 and a snail-shaped door pull marked down to $7.95 from $20. At Target.com, I found a set of four plastic knobs for $2.71, or about 70 cents each, and brass knobs for 75 cents a piece.

• Second-hand and cast-off furniture: My husband has purchased unique and attractive knobs and handles at thrift stores. Discarded furniture may have attractive handles, pulls and knobs.

• Internet flea markets: On eBay, I found: basic plastic knobs (38 cents), a collection of six floral ceramic pulls (69 cents for the set), a four-pack of Winnie the Pooh character drawer pulls for 82 cents, and sleek pewter handles (70 cents each), excluding shipping costs. On Amazon.com, the selection included decorative handles, pulls and knobs priced between 90 cents to $5.

• Be creative: Purchase plain wooden knobs and paint them, suggests Cheryl Wright of the Dollar Stretcher (www.stretcher.com). Consider using fewer drawer pulls, which are pricier than knobs. My friend saved a bundle by using more knobs, which were about 50 percent cheaper than the drawer pulls and handles.

This is from my latest column in the home & design section of the Miami Herald.
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Who Buys $700,000 Pens & $40,0000 Purses?

Forget the $500 Manolo Blahnik pumps. Those triple-digit shoes may be old-school. Luxury has new and higher prices, according to this report from Associated Press.

Members of the high-ticket, in-crowd are now wearing:

$1,000 shoes (up from $350 to $600)
$5,000 to $40,000 purses (up from $600)
$700,000 pens from Montblanc.

"Whether it's a handbag, shoe, or watch, the price of keeping up has gone up," said Kelly Bensimon, founding editor of Elle Accessories in an AP report.

The wild prices and the very conspicuous consumption reflect the widening gap between the wealthy (annual salary over $350,000) and the rest of us. That gap has grown to the widest levels since the Depression, according to some market experts.

But I don't buy that explanation. Some of the wealthiest people I know are very, very frugal shoppers. They're very generous, but they don't waste money. So who is buying all of that big-ticket merchandise, where sales and prices have been popping higher?

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What is Evaporated Cane Juice? Verbal Inflation

Trying to be good consumers, my husband and I often read labels. Yesterday, we stumbled on this ingredient: "organic evaporated cane juice??" What is that?

The answer: Organic evaporated cane juice is just another word for "sugar." Phrases like that make it difficult to shop and harder to get the most for our money. The evaporated cane juice double-speak example prompted me to put together a list of shady terms:

1. "pre-owned" = used merchandise
2. "vintage" = used designer stuff at big-ticket prices
3. "seasoned" = very used, possibly worn out
4. "resigned for personal reasons" = fired
5. "down-sizing/ right-sizing" = lots of layoffs
6. "negative cash flow" = I'm broke
7 "cash short fall" = I'm broke
8. "upper respiratory infection" = a head cold
9. "no interest for 12 months" = you'll pay double later
10. "Light-Juice" = regular juice diluted with water. Less juice per dollar

www.damronplanet.com featured these "Examples of Inflated Language"

negative patient care outcome = the patient died
mental activity at the margins = insanity
reutilization marketing yard= junkyard

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Sarah Jessica Parker's New Line of $20 Clothes

Sarah Jessica Parker -- fashion maven and queen of high-ticket, high-heel ($500) pumps -- now advocates "affordable fashion," according to the June 8 edition of People.com.

Her new clothes hang-up makes cents because Parker has launched her own line of affordable clothes. The Chicago Tribune reports that Parker's new clothes line Bitten, for the Steve & Barry’s stores features an extensive selection of garments for $20 an under. The photo on this post features a sample from her line.

"You should be able to have affordable, quality fashion," the actress told PEOPLE.

Parenting Magazine offered this review of Bitten and recently named the line one of its top editor's picks. Here's a short snippet of the review.

"While everything's stylin', nothing in the line costs more than $20. And the sizes range from 0 to 22, so you'll get a great fit for your body, not just your budget. ($20 and under; available at: Steve & Barry's stores nationwide)."

The Budget Fashionista has also been tracking this thrifty line from Parker.

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Lessons From A Fire; What I Learned While Stuck on A Balcony

Fire struck the apartment building in which I live. The fire left one family homeless and taught the rest of us valuable lessons. And while stuck on my seventh floor balcony, I had plenty of time to digest a few frugal and life lessons.

Here's what happened: A microwave on a lower floor blew up and created a huge flame. Because he was walking the dog, my husband was already out of the apartment and my children left the apartment, exiting through smoke. But I was in the shower, and by the time, I dressed and attempted to help an older neighbor, I was not able to leave the building. The stairwells were filled with smoke.

It all ended well. No one was injured and my neighbors have found a new home until their burnt out apartment can be repaired in about three months.

Here's what I learned from the fire.


1. Even small doses of time matter: I really did not delay. But in the short time that it took me to dress and inquire about my neighbor, the stairwells were too filled with smoke to exit.

Financial lessons: From paying bills to saving for a vacation/education/retirement: Times flies and time matters. Move quickly, move thoughtfully; but don't panic.


2. Pay attention: While I ran from stairwell to stairwell, all of those lessons from school fire drills came back to me and I was belatedly happy that I had paid a little bit of attention to the instructions. I knew, for example, not to try to exit through the heavy smoke because more people are seriously injured from smoke inhalation than burns.

Financial lesson: Pay attention to details. Listen to instructions. You never know what piece of advice you'll need in an emergency.


3. Find a safe haven: My balcony became my safe room. In the open air, I did not have to worry about smoke fumes and I knew that if the fire spread, I could be reached by a cherry picker.

Financial lesson: Have a good exit strategy and find a save haven for finances.


4. Have a plan. My family needs an emergency plan. My husband was walking the dog when the fire started. I was in the shower and my children left the apartment on their own without shoes. (The firemen helped them down)

And until they saw me on the balcony, everyone was worried. In the future, we'll have some kind of system for emergency evacuations and a meeting place.

(I wasn't alone. Other families were stranded and separated in different parts of the building.)

Financial lesson: Create a plan, a budget, a financial strategy and stick with it.) Drills are also important.

Meanwhile, here are some fire safety tips.

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How to Dig Into Free Garden Advice

Looking for advice about drought-friendly plants or garden design? There many free home garden programs and services.

• Plant Doctor. Log Cabin Nursery, a nonprofit Miami Beach organization, will diagnose sick plants and provide free information about care, said Gladstone Phillips, nursery director.
To get the best diagnosis, show up with a sample of the ailing plant. ''It's like going to the doctor,'' Phillips said. Based on clippings, Log Cabin Nursery will also identify the plants in your yard and provide care instructions.

• Frugal gardening tips. The Florida Yards and Neighborhoods Program provides information about how to care for your garden using less water and less fertilizer, according to John McLaughlin, home garden specialist at the Miami-Dade County Extension office. This program consists of free lectures and brochures.
Program speakers are available to make free presentations to condo and homeowner associations. The Florida Yards and Neighborhoods Program can be reached at hort.ufl.edu/fyn/.
The University of Florida Extension also has garden info at its ''Solutions For Your Life'' site at solutionsforyourlife.ufl.edu.

For those outside of Florida, I recommend checking out county and state agricultural extension programs.

• Free Herb and Spice seminars. The Broward Herb and Spice Society provides free seminars and lectures about culinary, medicinal and aromatic spices, says Lu Weber, a representative for the organization. Beginning in August, monthly meetings are the fourth Monday of every month at the Broward County Cooperative Extension office. For information contact Herbanspot@bellsouth.net.

• Free garden and landscape design consultations. At Log Cabin Nursery, Phillips will help you design a garden and select hedges, with information about which plants are hardier near the ocean or inland. Likewise, certified horticulturists are available in the garden department at Home Depot stores to help select plants that are best suited for your home garden, according to Sheriee Bowman, a spokeswoman for Home Depot.

• Garden pest information. E-mail your questions about garden pests (and plants) to the Miami Dade County Extension office, aghu@ifas.ufl.edu. Attach a digital image of the insect or plant and a representative will respond to your inquiry. ''We're here to help home gardeners,'' McLaughlin says.

This is from my latest column in the Home & Design section of the Miami Herald. Although this piece is very specific to South Florida, the same process can be applied to other areas of the country. Non-profit nurseries, county and state programs can provide many free garden and pests services.

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Delayed Gratification: New York Must Wait

We were going to New York for a mid-June wedding. (My sister-in-law's brother is getting married in Crown Heights.) But the realities of time, money & energy have prompted us to delay the trip. We'll miss the June family wedding, but we will go -- I hope --to New York in August.

By August:

1) I will have finished --G-d willing-- writing my non-fiction book and will have delivered the manuscript to the publisher (DPL Press) by the July 15 deadline. The book is due out in May of 2008.

2) I will have collected additional funds for a fun-filled week in Manhattan & Brooklyn

3) And by late summer, I will catch up on some book-keeping, bills and other tasks that I have let slide, while I've been busy writing.


Delayed gratification is a trick that works well for my money-saving drive. When I postpone spending, I carefully examine needs vs. wants vs. fantasies. The extra time also allows me to shop around for the best deals and prices. More importantly, when I wait, sometimes I opt to avoid certain expenses altogether.

I'm sorry about missing the June wedding. But that's the reality for now. We'll do New York later.



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My Son: Second Generation Dumpster Diver!

Treasure from trash. That's what my oldest son recently discovered. In his travels, he recently came across a group of students who were cleaning out their lockers and backpacks as the school year concluded.

To my son's amazement, some of the students emptied unused school supplies into a trash bin, including new or barely used notebooks.

My son retrieved a few of the pristine notebooks and now has a head start in our annual back-to-school preparations. I was proud of him. In general, however, I have mixed feelings about dumpster diving.

Here are my rules:

1. Clean trash only. Example: when I was at a summer writing workshop in the Hamptons, the school was closing its library and other facilities. As a result, the maintenance staff filled a huge bin with books, supplies, music and other trinkets (even holiday lights). That's clean trash. Many writing workshop participants happily picked through that bin.

2. Curbside pickups. On a regular basis, our municipality does a large, big-ticket pickup. The residents place lamps, office chairs, sofas and other items on the curb. Some of the stuff is pretty good and car loads of "shoppers" get out early and look for treasure in that trash. This strategy works especially well in upscale neighborhoods, where the trash looks like an antique fair.

3.Office Trash: In an office district, a friend of mine found an excellent computer chair for her home office. A business was remodeling and unwanted office fixtures/furniture were discarded at the curb.


But, I avoid messy trash that looks shady or hazardous.



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Jason Priestly Bulks Up at Costco & Things I Love 'n Hate about Big Box Stores

Check out actor Jason Priestly's shopping cart during a recent trip to Costco. In this photo (third down on the right column) from Us Magazine, Priestly has a cart filled with bulk purchases.

"You name it, I can cook it!" JASON PRIESTLEY (grabbing paper products and other groceries at a Hollywood Costco May 31) has said. "--Us Magazine June 18, 2007)

His cart contained: Huge packages of paper towels, bath tissue, detergent, OJ, a mop, plus lots of other stuff.

His overstuffed cart reminded me of the why I love and hate big box outlets.

Why I Love Bulk Outlets

1. Beautiful produce. In my neighborhood, there's a rumor that one very posh gourmet store gets all of its produce from Costco. Apparently, the buyer from the posh store picks the prettiest and lushest Costco produce, which is re-sold at big-ticket prices at the posh store. A friend of mine has even spotted organic produce at Costco.

2. Great gifts: A friend of mine always finds great gifts and crafts at Costco. She has a great gift closet.

3. The big packages: There's something very comforting about a supply closet stocked with enough paper towels, tissues and detergent to last for at least three weeks.

4. The books: Bestsellers are cheap, cheap, cheap at Costco. Of course, it's cheaper to just borrow a copy from a friend or the library.

5. Gas. Some Costco locations and BJ's Wholesale sell gas at super cheap prices.


Why I don't Love Big Box Stores:

1. The membership fee. Why do I have to pay to shop?

2. The random purchases and treasure finds. Some of my friends always come home from big box stores with random merchandise that they don't really need.

3. The unit price watch: Don't assume the big bulk purchases are the best deals. You have to do the math. Some of the so-called bulk deals are actually more expensive than the smaller packages.

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The Best & Worst Times to Do Stuff

Early-bird diners have a point: Timing is everything when we are trying to save energy, time and money. I've learned that lesson the hard way and have wasted valuable hours and dollars by selecting poor time slots for errands, appointments and other commitments.

Therefore, I was pleased when I found this article about the best & worst times for errands in an old issue of Redbook magazine. Here's the schedule:

Gym Workouts:

Best time: Early AM on weekends, after dinner or lunch breaks.
Worst time: Immediately before or after work.

Medical Appointments:

Best Time: Early AM
Worst Time: End of the day. (Delays throughout the day create crowded offices by late afternoon)

Shopping at the Mall:

Best Time: Thursday nights and weekday mornings
Worst Time: Weekends

Buying Gas

Best Time: After dinner, especially midweek
Worst: Morning or evening rush hour.







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When to Repair; When to Replace Appliances

We depend on home appliances. They fill our kitchens, laundry rooms and garages. Since it's hard to live without them, here's a guide to determine if an appliance should be replaced or repaired:

• Age: Most washers, refrigerators, dryers and stoves have a 10- to 15-year life. If your home appliance is less than 10 years old, paying for a repair may be a good investment, says Mike Kozlowski, an appliance expert at Sears.

• Cost: A repair should not cost more that 50 percent to 60 percent of the price of a new appliance. The Association of Home Appliance Manufacturers suggests getting a repair estimate that includes parts, labor and other fees. Also test the outlets and fuses in your home; the appliance may not be faulty.

• Calculate total replacement costs: Don't stop with price tags when comparing replacement vs. repair. Consider installation, delivery and other charges.

• Include ''wild-card'' factors: How will a replacement match or complement existing fixtures in your kitchen or laundry room? If your kitchen appliances are all stainless steel, it's better to purchase a matching replacement when shopping for a new dishwasher, oven or a refrigerator. If the right match -- in look, fit and feel -- is difficult to find, the repair option might be wiser. Mismatched appliances typically lower the resale value of a home, Kozlowski says.

• Compare energy savings: New products may use up to 70 percent less energy than older models. Therefore, lower energy bills could offset the cost of a replacement.

• Free advice: Appliance repair advice is available online at manageyourhome.com and at www.aham.org.

This is from my latest column in the Home & Design Section of the Miami Herald.
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How I Fixed My Burnt Soup

I'm not much in the kitchen, but I make awesome soups. Today, however, I burnt the soup that I was making for a sick neighbor. Here's how I repaired the soup.

1. Stop stirring. I didn't want to stir the burnt bottom into the rest of the soup.

2. Switch pots, thereby leaving the burnt portion on the bottom.

3. I added lots of garlic, mustard and vinegar.

4. Diluted the broth with more water and tomato sauce.

5. Tossed in a large peeled potato. I let the potato cook in for a bit in order to remove the smoky flavor. When I removed the potato, my soup was less smoky. The potato absorbed the burnt flavor.

6. Renamed my soup. It's now smoky corn and tomato soup.
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