Clearly, the high cost of regrets also eats into emotional and physical health, which can create additional financial tolls. What's more, if my subconscious mind is engaged in replaying old reels, I have less energy to devote to the here-and-now. It's not a Ferris wheel that you want to ride.
The remedy: Apologize, make amends, change behavior & move on. That's the formula suggested by business mavens such as Brian Tracy, author of the book: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life. In that text, Tracy recommends contacting those that you have wronged in the past and simply apologize. Regardless of the response you receive, it's a very liberating process.
"Apologizing can have health benefits such as lower stress levels," according to Maria Neuman, author of the Art of Saying Sorry, an article which appeared in a past issue of Self magazine. She cites a report from the University of Michigan, which linked apologies to improved health. Neuman's article outlined three basic steps for saying sorry:
2. Take responsibility
3. Be willing -- if possible -- to remedy the situation.
Personally, I subscribe to Brian Tracy's system: He urges phoning or writing someone that you have wronged and just lay it out: For example: I hurt you, I'm sorry... Just that simple. It's just good Karma to say sorry.
From experience, I will testify that it's a difficult process, but it's far harder to carry around a fat purse (or suitcase) of regret. It's also important, Tracy says, to forgive oneself. For me, that's the hardest part. And sometimes, I feel lost in a Grade-B movie of my worst moments.
But letting go of self-directed anger is a crucial step to moving on. On that account, Brian Tracy offers a helpful reminder: Either due to inexperience or immaturity, many of us made errors in the past (financial, professional or personal), that we would not make now. Quite simply: we're not the same person that we were back-in-the-day and we have far more resources to cope with difficult situations.
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Sharon Harvey Rosenberg is the author of The Frugal Duchess of South Beach: How to Live Well and Save Money... Anywhere!, which will be published in May of 2008 by DPL Press.
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Previous Posts
Sharon Harvey Rosenberg is the author of The Frugal Duchess of South Beach: How to Live Well and Save Money... Anywhere!, which will be published in May of 2008 by DPL Press.
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Previous Posts
Today:
First-Person & Public: How Writing in the First-Person Saves Money
Yesterday:
Park Carefully: 10 Frugal Tips for Post-Holiday Shopping
Yesterday:
Park Carefully: 10 Frugal Tips for Post-Holiday Shopping
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